It’s later in the day than usual as I sit down to write this
week’s Forget YOU Not blog post. It’s been a long week. A long work week, a
long grief week. Yesterday marked three years since our world lost a wonderful
man, Heaven got another angel, and Dillon got his Guardian Angel. It feels like
forever since he’s been here, but the other morning it felt just like yesterday
when I could call him and ask him to take our son to school for me because I’d
had an insomniac night. I sat on the edge of my bed Monday morning remembering
all the mornings he would drive to our house just to take our son to school, to
get a few minutes with Dillon at the start of his day. And then there were days
that I was either not feeling great, hadn’t slept well, or was buried in work
and I could text him early and sure enough he didn’t hesitate; he would come to
our call. He certainly was a great and devoted dad and a good friend to many.
And, already three years…
Today, Heaven got another wonderful man and angel. I’ve
known him five years, but only through work. You could see the Lord in his
presence at the conferences and it was heartwarming to know that his faith was
strong and he was not fearful of his return Home. It’s really hard on the ones
left behind. I found out yesterday that he was in Hospice after a rapid decline
from the return of “The Nasty C”. I’ve been praying for him and his family the
past month and especially for their comfort and strength the past 36 hours.
This weekend marks a year since I last saw my sweet BJ. It’s
been an overwhelming week. I’m sitting here in Rich’s chair, in the corner of
the living room where I can see BJ’s Forever Tree outside and the loveseat
where he last sat and told me stories; where we laughed about the antics that
surrounded his life. The story that Teri was telling about their Labor Day
camping trip, as he turned and looked at her. She apparently “knew the look”
because she innocently asked, “haven’t you told your mom this?” He was like…ummmm, not until now (with an ear
to ear grin, knowing he was busted)! LOL
So, his version of the story ensued; I especially enjoyed his telling
that Jaime scaled the side of his travel trailer! He was a great storyteller
and I will never say that it was all accurate or that there weren’t “add-ins”
because with BJ that was a given! Memories are good –Death is difficult.
I will not be consumed in loss this weekend; it is my
birthday tomorrow and BJ and Rich and all those that are now gone would not
want me sad. They would not want our lives to stop. I can take time to grieve
and I can take time to be happy. One has nothing to do with the other. I am happily grieving my way through life and
I am good with that because it means that I am not sitting still in grief.
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