Remember the Goodness

Another summer comes to an end as another school year begins. Technically we have a few more weeks of summer, but for those of us with kids or connected to school our summer shuts down Labor Day Weekend. I've been in Central Oregon the last few days of our summer break spending time with family and helping a cherished loved one make the transition from a lengthy hospital stay to life back home with her doggies. Ten and a half months ago she had the first of a few surgeries…on the very day we lost BJ. BJ was like a son to her and she was devastated too. BJ was pretty good about checking in on her and helping when he could. Just this week she shared with me that she found out about BJ when most of us did…the day after his accident. She was crying when her doctor came in that day and yet a few days later; still recovering, she had her daughter drive her three and a half hours to spend some time with me.

It's still so hard to believe he's gone. In many ways it seems like I just saw him and his smiling face and in other ways it seems like a lifetime. He would be preparing for his daughter to start second grade and most likely he would be going camping this weekend. Even though he died in October, the last time I saw him was my birthday weekend which is quickly approaching. A year…it will mark a year since I saw him, touched him, hugged him, and laughed at his never ending stories. He always seemed to have new stories to tell. There was rarely a dull moment of time spent with my boy. I also know this upcoming mid-September weekend will mark a year since many other friends and family in the Portland area saw him, laughed with him, or shared a beer with him. It was a great weekend. He came to "the valley" for a birthday party with his daughter and Teri. The time with me was brief, but good. Not only were they going another 40 miles to a party, they were doing some school clothes shopping for his precious little girl. It was a great weekend for them and they enjoyed it so much. I was the lucky one because he almost always slept at moms when he came to town, so no matter what he was doing or where he was going I got to have the sleepovers and steal minutes where ever I could. I'm a little melancholy as I reflect on these times; knowing they no longer exist. I no longer get those "pop in" visits, but I can still vividly see his face and his smile, I still hear the last story he told me, and then I close my eyes and I can still feel his grand hug. And for now, that has to be enough. Enough…until we are together again, in the blink of an eye.

Stay strong, help where you can, and through the sadness remember the goodness and the blessing you had of their life with you.